This is another mindless and crappy post, written in a very bias and very confused mind. Jason does not even know what he is mumbling about, for his points can be confusing and contradicts with his other points. If it does not make any sense, shoot me. Jason is kind of confused and lost lately.

Few weeks ago, there were a few people – Juliana, Alphonso and Auntie Lilian blogged about love in different aspect, with different ideas and perceptions. I have read about it, but I did not leave any comment behind because I am not even able to handle my own feelings wisely, what more to comment or criticize others. However, their posts did make me wonder what love is. Since shitty things happened yesterday and hence, I decided to blog a post, which is slightly related to love.

To fall in love, the first thing that will come into your mind will be “feelings”. I bet most of us know what / how / why about feelings, which no people will understand it better than your very own self. A feeling is part of the essential things that one seeks for before jumping into a relationship, especially for the girls. However, in my own opinion, it is not the most important or vital because I strongly believe that feeling can be developed or grew as time ticks away. If there is feeling before the relationship starts, I consider that as an advantage or a bonus to a better relationship, but definitely not a foundation or a key to start a relationship. How many guys / girls got rejected just because of this “principle”?

Even if there is feeling for the other party, is it “the” feeling? To like somebody and to love somebody, what is the difference? My friends felt that I was naive and stupid when I say like and love are two different things. Carol would agree with me, right? If I am to write it in mathematics equation, the equation will be “love equals to like, but like does not equals to love.” One of my friend, N (First time using nicknames for the characters in my blog.), could have mixed up the feeling with some other feelings. I remembered N told me that she accepted (as in starting a relationship) him because the feeling was strong and she liked him at that particular moment. Later on, she did tell me that she did not really love him; the feeling was more towards like. –sweat- What is the point of having a relationship that has a weak or no love between a couples? Situation will be even worse if things are not working out.

Feeling also varies because of your looks / money. For those who have read Mr. Kiasu’s post about this, thank you for saving my effort in writing this paragraph. For those who do not, maybe you should start reading Mr. Kiasu’s blog. Although there are girls / guys who said looks / money do not matter, I still doubt with what they said. No offense to those who really mean it. Pretty girls and handsome guys will never have difficulties in understanding what is like is to be looked down or brush aside because of our looks. (If you want to read what Mr. Kiasu has written, please click on the comment links to find the appropriate links; that is after Mr. Kiasu posted the link. Thank you.)

Attitude and responsibilities play an even more important role in a relationship. Attitude like “hangat-hangat tahi ayam” is definitely a no-no, unless you are looking for one nightstand or engaging yourself in a puppy love; and that is just one example. Responsibilities that you have to bear are a lot heavier, as you are attached to somebody. You have to think about your partner in the things you do, as you do not want to hurt him / her. Selfishness and self-centered “attitude” will only hasten the break up process if either party is not willing to sacrifice. Sacrifices have to be made for the partner, from time, effort, pleasure, hobbies, friends. and sometimes, even studies. A relationship is not just about watching movies, holding hands, talking non stop for 6 hours in the car, kissing or touching, crying, buying gifts or giving flowers, but it is something that both parties have to mould themselves into a better person when in love / a relationship with somebody, in order to make the relationship goes on. It is easy to fall in love and to start a relationship, but it is difficult to keep it going.

Besides, it is wise to know and to be clear of what you are looking for in one relationship, or at least, know what you are doing and what will happen to you after kicking off the relationship. To be together with another person just because of feeling, is just not wise (?) enough. At least, N did that which resulted in “I do not know” as the answer to most of my question when comes to her relationship. Another friend, A is not too bad either. She can never be single (as far as I am concern) for a certain period of time. She would come to me, crying while talking to me during her critical moment and after her breakup. 1 or 2 weeks later, she would be attached to another guy, which usually I would find out later. When I asked her about it, she would just giggle away while I shook my head. –slaps forehead-

Not only that, cases like trapping between 2 guys / girls, a guy / girl courting a girl / guy for years or even decades, a guy / girl treating a girl / guy too good until guiltiness starts to kick in, a guy / girl being too close with a girl / guy until it kills the thoughts of being together, long distance / online based relationship and etc., are all special cases that have to be viewed, treated and act accordingly. Some will eventually become true love, some will always remain a one sided “true” love, and some even will never be together but yet there are feeling between them. There is a wonderful girl, J, whom I really respect because of the sacrifices she and he made just because of 2 situations, which I did mention above. There is another guy, A, who actually changed himself so much, from bad to good, for the sake of his girl friend just because the girl has some violent pedigree.

There are so many happy and sad endings out there, which happened because of love. Only those who have are willing to sacrifice, to change themselves, to bear the responsibilities, to open their hearts, will have a better chance of falling in love and finding true love. It is the heart that matters, miracles will never ever happen if one is not willing to open his / her heart to her / him, in order to give both sides a chance to try / make things out. It is the heart and the effort that creates miracles. I give my respect to Siew Sin as the couples are engaging in a long distance relationship but yet, they manged to create their own miracles. Not to leave out, our most “lan tiu” blogger - Tiu Nia Sing who is going to propose to CJ because of his true love for her.

This post is supposed to be an email to somebody, but I took it off and posted it here instead. Actually, I do not know what I have written nor it does make any sense. I apologize for my pointless grumbling. Thank you for reading.

P/S :

Juliana, Alphonso amd Mr. Kiasu, can you guys please write down the permalink of the posts about love that you all blogged before in the comment sections? I remembered Simon has written something similar as well in one of his recent post. For those who wrote similar things, feel free to do promotion of your own blog.

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